“Mumma, I am not able to do monkey bars in the park. All my friends can do it, even those who are younger than me also do it.”
Complained my 7 years old, when she returned from the park yesterday.
Now, was my turn to help her to achieve this milestone that she wanted for herself. I promised to accompany her to the park the next day and help her.
She was right, despite so many efforts on her part, she could only reach the first bar and the moment she tried to move on to the second, she lost her balance and fell. Her friends could easily move on from the first to last and start over again.
I started observing the other kids while supporting my daughter by holding her legs to enable her to move ahead. But she was not so happy with the support, she wanted to do it all alone by herself.
After some time, I told her to take a break and play something else for the time being. She agreed, and when she was away, I tried to practice monkey bar myself. I got some realization that I wanted to share with my girl.
In the night, before her sleep time, I initiated the discussions and asked her,
“Did you notice why you are not able to do it?”
She was clueless.
I asked another question, “Once you are hanging on the first bar with both hands, what is the next step that you have to follow to move on to the next bar?”
“Mumma, we have to release one hand from the first bar and grab the next bar with it.”
“So, what do you think, when you are trying to release your hand, why do you fall?”
After a pause, she gave a cute expression of ignorance, and said “I don’t know.”
“Because, your focus is still on the hand that is holding on to the first bar, whereas to move ahead, you have to focus on your hand that is going ahead. You have to be confident of the hold of the hand moving ahead. You have to believe in that hand and hold on to the next bar. If you focus only on holding on to the first bar, you will not be able to move on and hold the next one.”
“Hmmm, OK Mumma, I will try it tomorrow.”
This could bring a smile to her face with the hope that she will be able to do it the next day and she slept peacefully hugging her teddy.
And then, I went into deep reflection on what I just mentioned to her.
Many times, in our life, we face such situations. Where we are hanging on to the first bar (our past), though we want to move ahead, we struggle for it and despite so many attempts to move on, we fall. We try again, but still do not succeed. We see other people easily moving ahead and we are still hanging on to the first bar helplessly.
At that point, if we focus on what lies ahead, if we build the confidence to take the next step, if we get ready to leave our comfort zone (the first bar) behind and plunge into the next bar courageously, we may be able to get what we want.
It is in that moment of releasing, grasping and moving on, that our life changes.
It needs the courage to leave the first bar and move on to the next, that moment when we will be able to build the courage, will be our ‘Aha moment’. Keep grasping such ‘Aha moments’ in your life.
Be courageous and trust your move.